Monday, December 4, 2017

How about a Snippet? This time something for the holidays


As usual, I was fast asleep when the shouting started. Listening for a moment I could only hear Chuck’s voice, but it was getting louder and louder. I heard Bill say something, but he was drowned out quickly. Shaking my head, I rolled out of bed. Fortunately, I had left my pants hanging off the chair next to the bed or I would have been banging around looking still.

“... and I say he’s a myth! There is no way to travel that much in one night! It’s impossible,” Chuck yelled.

“Just about every country has someone like him in it. He could be telling the truth, you know,” Bill tried to point out.

“See! I told you.” Fergus’s voice chimed in from the table top.

“That doesn’t mean a thing and you know it. Besides, what do you know about animals other than yourself?” Chuck asked.

“I know things. We animals talk to each other after all,” Fergus replied.

“There’s no way…” Chuck didn’t get to finish because I’d had enough.

“Hold that thought and stop! What the flaming hell is going on out here? You idiots do know that I’m sleeping here, right? We all have work in the morning,” I yelled.

“But he said...” Chuck started to say.

“No buts. Explain yourselves. Now.” I replied in a loud voice.

All three of them answered at once. “He said…”

I muttered a word of power and everything stopped. Bill, Chuck, and Cat were frozen in place. Fergus hopped up and down and started making nyah nyah noises at them.

“Chill out Fergus or I’ll put your barn on the roof of the bus again.” I told him.

Fergus stuttered to a stop and just stared at me in shock.

I chuckled to myself. A couple of weeks ago he ate a bunch of Mexican food and had enough gas to run the bus. I Magickally secured his barn to the roof and left him up there for a couple of hours.

Dragging one of the office chairs over I plopped down in front of my arguing team members. One word later they were back with us.

“Now. What is this about?” I asked.

Once again they all started to answer at once. I raised my finger in the air. “Stop or I’ll freeze you again. One at a time.”

Bill cleared his throat and glanced from side to side at Cat and Chuck. Both nodded at him. “Fergus started it actually.”

Fergus hopped up and started to say something.

“Stifle it.” I told him.

I looked at Bill expectantly.

“As I said. He started it by saying Santa Claus and flying reindeer were real. That he’d met him. Chuck started saying he was lying and the conversation devolved from there. Cat and I barely got a word in edgewise.” Bill stated.

I cocked my head to one side and laughed. “Is that all? Chuck, why did you argue with Fergus?”

Chuck looked at me in shock. “He has to be lying. How would he know if Santa Claus is real or not?”

Pursing my lips I looked at the forensic specialist and smiled. “What if he really is real? What would say then?”

“There’s no way reindeer can fly. Fergus has to be lying.” Chuck replied.

“You work everyday with a Witch who owns a small talking Unicorn, A sexy professional woman who turns into a gigantic sabertooth tiger, and a daywalking Vampire. And let’s not forget Bill over there. He’s like the oldest working FBI Agent in the country. How can you not believe in flying reindeer?” I asked.

Bill made a grunting noise. When I looked in his direction, he was surreptitiously giving me the finger under the guise of scratching his nose.

Cat spoke and nudged Bill.  “Because we’re real and they aren’t?"

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