“What you doing?” Fergus’s voice came out of nowhere, almost causing me to drop the mixture.
“Don’t do that! Do you know how long it took me to get that right?” I said looking down at a smiling unicorn sitting on my notebook.
“Nope. Don’t care. Can we go out to eat for lunch?” He complained.
“Why?” I looked down at him suspiciously. He’d been pretty quiet lately, which in itself is really suspicious. He still hadn’t forgiven me for leaving him locked in the RV when we took down the Reverend last month. According to him, he had his own adventure, but won’t tell me what it was. Speaking of not telling me something.
Looking him in the eyes, I asked, “how did you get up here? You were passed out in the magickal hay field.”
He looked up at me with a puzzled face. “No idea what you’re saying right now. Jumping up here was easy. So... Eating out, can we do it?”
“We need to discuss your jumping one of these days. Where is it you wanted to go?” I said.
“Do you remember Jodi from Anchors a Weigh? She doesn’t work there anymore.” He commented.
“OK. Was she the blond waitress?” I asked.
“No, you always get that part wrong. Jodi is the brunette, and Amber is the redhead. Easy.” He answered, then began trotting around the various jars I had on the table.
“Wasn’t there another one too? I seem to remember another name.” I tapped my finger against my lips while trying to remember.
“Forget about her. She got married last month. This is all about Jodi. I mean all about eating lunch.” He spoke quickly trying to cover his gaft.
I made a circular motion with my hand as I asked. “Can we speed this up? I do have an experiment to finish.”
“What are you trying to do, anyway?” He mumbled sniffing at a small bouquet of wolfsbane flowers on the table and taking a tentative taste.
I slid the flowers out of reach. “Don’t eat those! Do you have any concept of how expensive those are?” Once again, he just looked up at me.
I’m telling a unicorn to not eat flowers. “This is an enchantment to make bullets find the target on their own. If I got the recipe correct, they should give me a better than fifty percent improvement in my range scores.”
Fergus peered at the vial sitting in front of me. “As long as that isn’t something you eat your fine. You suck at cooking. So can we go?”
“Go where? You never finished what you were saying.” I asked. Why couldn’t I have changed something less annoying like a sloth or something?
“Oh. Well, Jodi went to work for a new place called Juan’s in town. Can we go there for lunch?” He said, continuing to trot around on my table.
Frowning I looked back at him. “Do you even like Mexican food? How do you know about this stuff?”
“Jodi’s cousin owns the place. She told me last week that Obie had a job opening and she wouldn’t be able to see me anymore at Anchors. She sent me a picture of the new place, and it looks cool. It has lots of pretty colors and flags. Can we go?” He asked anxiously.
I swear he’s like a little kid sometimes. “Sure. You aren’t going to shut up until I agree anyhow. One thing, though. Doesn’t it bother you that a guy named Obie owns a restaurant called Juan’s?” I asked him.
He cocked his head one way and then the other. “So? Why would that bother me?” He said as he trotted off to the far edge of the table. I kept a horse bed there for him.
Unicorns. I shook my head and went back to my experiment.
Once I cleaned up my workspace, it was time for lunch. I carried him to our truck for the trip to the restaurant. We had not traveled very far before Fergus vomited on the seat. Apparently, Fergus was not having a good ‘travel’ day and had gotten sick. Climbing back into my vehicle after cleaning up the mess I checked my phone. It was blowing up a moment ago, but I ignored it.
“I’m going to die! Ugh.” Fergus choked and coughed out.
“If you get sick in my truck again you’re riding on the outside. I mean it, Fergus!” I commented as I finished cleaning up his second heap. How can one tiny creature hurl so much?
“Just bury me in Mothra like you promised when I go.” He groaned.
“Don’t you mean Montana? Mothra is one of those movie monsters you like so much.” I absently responded. Scrolling through my messages, I could see two from the B’s and three from Director Mills. Cat and Chuck had at least one in there too. Maybe I could blame Fergus for this delay. He’s the one that ate the Wolfsbane.
As I pulled up to the restaurant, Fergus said. “See, what did I tell you. Pretty flags and colors everywhere.” Fergus was sitting on my shoulder like a deranged parrot as we walked into the incredibly garish restaurant. I like Mexican food, but I could tell this was not going to be fun.
Fergus’s favorite waitress of the month stood at the cash register with a big fake smile on her face. “Jodi!” Fergus yelled, jumping around and nearly falling off.
“Hey, little dude! I see you found the place.” Jodi replied looking up at me. “Hello, Agent Blackmore.”
“Jodi. How’s business?” I inquired. The restaurant was inside a former gas station which I thought was a bit strange. The pumps outside were all gone. Only the poles that once held up the awning remained.
Jodi grinned and said, “Great! The lunch rush just ended. Let me get you a table.” As she led us to a table, I checked my watch, and it was only twelve thirty. Maybe people ate early here in Virginia.
The walls were still glass but painted over in red, green, and white. There were painted smiling girls with red hair and pigtails staring up at me from our tabletop. “Nice tables,” I remarked.
Jodi blushed a bit saying, “My cousin was on a budget. We plan to paint over them soon. What would you like to drink?”
I could only shake my head as Fergus ordered a sweet tea. Maybe it was time to take his phone away from him. I just asked for water. Leaving two menus in front of us, she let me know she would be back to take our orders. Fergus hopped around and stared at the pictures.
“What’s this stuff? Is it a salad?” He asked as he turned the pages with his nose. It was probably a good thing the health department wasn’t here. A seeing eye unicorn is not a good description of Fergus.
Cocking my head, I looked at the picture. “Traditional Chiapas salad with peppers and local greens encased in a fried flour tortilla.” I interpreted for him.
“Cool! I’m getting that one!” He said as he did a little dance on the table.
Pulling out my phone I looked up the word Chiapas. Another word popped out during my search, spicy. I couldn’t remember if he liked spicy food. Grandmother used to let him try stuff while she cooked. Since I was so bad at cooking, I was rarely in our kitchen. It should be fun to watch no matter what. Good thing he was indestructible.